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the bloggin bitches!

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Saran Wrap [Aug. 2nd, 2005|09:54 pm]
the bloggin bitches!

anachronismus
Cling wrap is a motherfucking joke. It sticks to nothing but itself. It makes a mockery of kitchen convenience items! It isn't even all that great for oral sex purposes. It's supposedly tremendously easy to inhale it and start choking which would obviously ruin the mood.

It can't wrap brownies.
It can't wrap a salad bowl.
It can't wrap you lover.


Fuck off cling wrap.
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a (not so) open letter couples (that i may or may not know)... UGH. [May. 20th, 2005|01:50 am]
the bloggin bitches!

july_fifteen
hi. i live with couples. i go to work with couples. i hang out with...you guessed it, couples. all my friends in new york are in damn couples, perpetually making me the third wheel or the friend who can come over if superlover is away. and they all want to set me up.

I LIKE BEING SINGLE. I LIKE NOT KNOWING WHO I'LL BE WITH ON SATURDAY NIGHT. I'M OKAY WITH BEING ALONE ON A SATURDAY NIGHT, AND SOMETIMES I PREFER IT.

stop looking at me with your sad eyes that say "oh honey, you'll find someone."

please don't do this to your single friends. it's not nice.
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(no subject) [Apr. 5th, 2005|07:34 pm]
the bloggin bitches!

by_your_throat
Topic: Women who go to the gym in full makeup, freshly done hair, and huge hoop earrings.
WHY?
I'm not talking about the women who just come from work. I'm talking about the women I see at 9am Saturday mornings. Most of them are under 25. They don't go to the gym to work out. They go to socialize. They hate sweating! Why even belong to a gym if you hate to sweat?? Yes, I am making huge blanket statements. No, I do not care because these women are ridiculous! Gym memberships are so expensive they're just in wasting their money on something they could easily do over an orange mocha frappacino. It's like they're just there to pick up guys, but they should now that the only people who can pick up guys in gyms, are other guys

The guys that make caveman grunts while lifting are a close second to these broads. Really now... if you have to burst a kidney just to get your scream out, maybe you should take it down a few notches.


Thank you blogginbitches. Over and out.
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fucking daylight savings!!! [Apr. 3rd, 2005|03:07 am]
the bloggin bitches!

july_fifteen
it's stupid. and i didn't know about it. no one told me! this is what i get for playing hermit all day. i really can't blame this on anyone, but having daylight savings creep up on me like makes me grouchy!! ooooooh bah. what a stupid thing to be angry about. watever, fuck daylight savings!
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RYAN FUCKING SEACREST [Mar. 24th, 2005|01:05 am]
the bloggin bitches!

july_fifteen
every time he opens his stupid mouth on american idol, i want to take the nearest object and hurl it at the tv!!! i would even rip out my own bloody heart just so i can throw it at his stupid face if it would give me any hope that he would shut the fuck up!!! i cannot stand that ignorant bastard with zero personality, he has the IQ of a fucking salad. STOP MANGLING PEOPLE'S NAMES! he belongs in a dark dark place where the general public will not have to see or hear from him, ever.
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